I'd say him.
Graydon Smith's career in contract law is off to an unpromising start.
Police were called to the Haller Lake home of the 31-year-old's parents in April. There, Smith's pregnant 19-year-old girlfriend told them that her boyfriend had threatened to kill her.
She took these threats seriously, she told police, because Smith had beat her up in past. He'd also asked her to sign an "abuse contract:" a letter that stated he was free to pound on her as much as he wanted for perpetuity, so long as he avoided her pregnant belly.
When cops contacted Smith by phone he denied the abuse. But strangely, he admitted to the part about the contract. Which in a way is an admission. Or at least an admission of profound stupidity.
For some reason, it took cops another month and another incident to arrest Smith. This time, it was his stepfather who called 911.
The dad had confronted Smith after he watched him choke his girlfriend for 10 seconds. Unhappy with the interruption, Smith tried to land a shot on pop's face but only ended up with a glancing blow.
When cops arrived they found the girlfriend bleeding from the face with a contusion on the back of her head. Smith was arrested and charged with second-degree assault, two counts of fourth-degree assault and two counts of felony harassment.
He's currently being held on $100,000 bail in King County Jail. And if karma exists, he'll have a cellmate as punch-happy towards him as he was to his pregnant girlfriend, only without all that messy legalese.